Love & Death in the South
My sweet darling beautiful cousin Chelsey got married on April 12 in Greensboro, North Carolina, and yes, I was there with my brother, parents, cousin Mikey, and two remaining aunties -- as well as, of course, my uncle Chausey (father of the bride) and Chausey's grandchildren Griffin, Chance and Izabella. Bink and I really wanted to go, most importantly to honor our cousin Andre (Chelsey's older brother, and father of the brood), who died in 2003 at 24 young years of age.
The wedding was a large, billowy affair, with a rehearsal dinner at the local country club, a ceremony at an old church with long columns and brick walls, and a reception at a castle estate full of manicured gardens and terraces. The church was full with a couple hundred people, most of whom I did not know, in formal Southern attire that I can best describe as traditional and curly. I can only imagine that a similar wedding might have looked the same 30+ years ago. Loved it. Especially the classical music. Nice call.
I felt quite protective about meeting her fiance Brad. Chelsey is the gem of the family -- gorgeous, kind, fun, sweet, funny and just darn-near perfect. The cousins and I talk about her often and the general consensus is that this man sure better deserve her. But he proved his mettle that first night when he stood to give a speech and actually shushed our whole table of Ruff's -- because none of us could stop chattering long enough to hear the man thank both families for coming and proclaiming his true deep love for Chelsey, his best friend. I approved and let her know. She patted my hand and said he was a great girlfriend, then smiled. Then I saw her take control of the wedding pictures and the reception. She may be sweet, but she's still truly my cousin, bless her.
Chausey showed us around a bit... we saw his house, his artwork, his garden, and made a visit to JR's discount mall and Biscuitville, because of course you can't visit North Carolina without having biscuits and gravy with salty ham. I'm proud to say that I ate more than anyone at Biscuitville. I just couldn't pass it up.
But still, there were tears. On the wedding program, Brad & Chelsey honored the family members who've died, including my beloved grandparents Joe & Lupe Ruff, and her brother Andre. We missed Andre, who should have been there. You know, we all experiment doing stupid things in our youth and some of us live through it. Andre was one of those who didn't. It was just a moment, a brief misjudgment, and it was all over. And a beloved son, brother, cousin, and father of three was gone. But as I mentioned to Chausey, he may have been young but he left behind a legacy, three beautiful spirited children. And perhaps this is what was meant to be.
Death is strange. It's everywhere and nowhere at the same time. Here, and gone.
The wedding was a large, billowy affair, with a rehearsal dinner at the local country club, a ceremony at an old church with long columns and brick walls, and a reception at a castle estate full of manicured gardens and terraces. The church was full with a couple hundred people, most of whom I did not know, in formal Southern attire that I can best describe as traditional and curly. I can only imagine that a similar wedding might have looked the same 30+ years ago. Loved it. Especially the classical music. Nice call.
I felt quite protective about meeting her fiance Brad. Chelsey is the gem of the family -- gorgeous, kind, fun, sweet, funny and just darn-near perfect. The cousins and I talk about her often and the general consensus is that this man sure better deserve her. But he proved his mettle that first night when he stood to give a speech and actually shushed our whole table of Ruff's -- because none of us could stop chattering long enough to hear the man thank both families for coming and proclaiming his true deep love for Chelsey, his best friend. I approved and let her know. She patted my hand and said he was a great girlfriend, then smiled. Then I saw her take control of the wedding pictures and the reception. She may be sweet, but she's still truly my cousin, bless her.Chausey showed us around a bit... we saw his house, his artwork, his garden, and made a visit to JR's discount mall and Biscuitville, because of course you can't visit North Carolina without having biscuits and gravy with salty ham. I'm proud to say that I ate more than anyone at Biscuitville. I just couldn't pass it up.
But still, there were tears. On the wedding program, Brad & Chelsey honored the family members who've died, including my beloved grandparents Joe & Lupe Ruff, and her brother Andre. We missed Andre, who should have been there. You know, we all experiment doing stupid things in our youth and some of us live through it. Andre was one of those who didn't. It was just a moment, a brief misjudgment, and it was all over. And a beloved son, brother, cousin, and father of three was gone. But as I mentioned to Chausey, he may have been young but he left behind a legacy, three beautiful spirited children. And perhaps this is what was meant to be.
Death is strange. It's everywhere and nowhere at the same time. Here, and gone.
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